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Tips to Help Develop Social Skills If Your Child Isn’t Happy At High School

Every day your child comes home from school with complaints of rejection of others saying ‘Everyone teases me.’, ‘Nobody loves me.’, ‘I'm always alone.’, ‘Nobody wants to play with me.’ And so on. You must recognize in these comments a distress call. It is obvious that your child is being difficult with social relations. To help overcome this challenge, you can take the following measures;

1 – Listen

Let off steam, and try to be impartial. By articulating the problem, maybe your child starts to look for the exit.

2 – Do not judge feelings!

If your child tells you he feels sad, or think you are fat or dumb, do not say, ‘Do not be ridiculous! That's not true.’ The feelings are real and legitimate, and to identify them is the first step to handle.

3 – Make specific questions

When the child says that everybody bothers him/her, ask for the names of those who they are to measure the problem.

4 – Find the positive

Encourage your child to think for those who have spoken well, and at times when it is fun, even a little. You can build on the positive when complaints cloud the horizon and you have to find a ray of light.

5 – Help your child to question his/her own behavior

Ask questions such as the following;

• What did you do before the other kid say that?
• How do you answer when the other kid say so?

Here you can find a pattern which your child must change to deal with the situation.

6 – Ask for help at school

Make an appointment with the teacher to exchange views and demonstrate your concern for the situation of your son/daughter. Ask the teacher to support your child by offering a stage to further strengthen his/her self-esteem.

7 – Invite your child’s potential friend at home

Support your child to practice social skills under your supervision by inviting only one friend at a time. It is good to have some planned activity like going to the movies or eating hamburgers to make it a positive experience for everyone.

8 – If necessary, seek professional support.

Child psychologists often provide social skills workshops, where participants interact with other children of their age, reflect on their difficulties and develop strategies to engage more successfully with others. Social skills are learned since we are not born with them, and often need a good teacher to teach us the way.

9 – Encourage your child to keep a diary

Every day, the challenge for the child is to target the nicest thing anyone has ever said and it will help your child to change his/her approach, seeking to identify good to build on it.

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